How do I choose the right dilators?
is a question often asked if your health care provider has not told you exactly what to buy, or provided you with a set.

The short answer is that it depends on why you need dilation.

There are three main reasons you might need a dilator set, and there are two main types of dilators, Rigid and Flexible.

1. VAGINOPLASTY You've had substantial constructive or reconstructive surgery and your neo-vagina needs to heal and its size and tone needs to be preserved using RIGID NON-TAPERED DILATORS. the fuller, non-tapered end will help preserve to openness and size of the top of your vagina.

The Rigid, Set of 4 with Vibratable Wand and Silicone Sleeve, Dr. Berman might be a good dilator choice for you

Your neo-vagina will require regular dilation and your healthcare practitioner may agree that you can use potentially more comfortable SILICONE DILATORS after you've fully recovered from surgery.

In this case, the Silicone, Vagiwell Vaginal Set of 3 Largest might be a good set for you

Or the Silicone, Set of 4 in Purple, Wellness

2. MEDICAL OR POST-TREATMENT CONDITION. Vaginismus, dyspareunia, vulvodynia, vestibulitis, lichen sclerosis, scar tissue formation or prevention, or following trauma, birth, pelvic injury, radiation therapy, or hormonal imbalance. The use of TAPERED SILICONE DILATORS will help establish or restore the comfortable function of your vagina and pelvic region. These might be good choices for you:

Silicone, Set of 3, Alena by Dr. Berman

Silicone, Set of 5 Wearable, She-Ology

You may find this additional information helpful.

3. TO increase FLEXIBILITY AND MUSCLE TONE to accommodate a partner or practice, and to enhance pleasurable response. In this case, you'll probably want to start with a larger SILICONE DILATOR SET and possibly experiment with vibration and self-pleasuring.

In this case, the Silicone, Vagiwell Vaginal Set of 3 Largest might be a good set for you

OR

The Rigid, Set of 4 with Vibratable Wand and Silicone Sleeve, Dr. Berman might be a good dilator choice for you

Conditions that commonly benefit from the use of vaginal dilators:

* Vaginismus - inability to have penetrative sex, use tampons, or undergo internal pelvic examinations due to spasms of the superficial layer of the pelvic floor muscles

* Dyspareunia - painful intercourse or penetration. This can be primary (from the first attempts at penetration) or secondary - usually at times of low oestrogen such as postnatally and menopause

* Vulvodynia, vestibulitis - pain and/or inflammation of the tissues around the opening of the vagina which can prevent comfortable sex, use of tampons, or medical examinations

* Scar tissue following surgery or vaginal birth

* To maintain the stretch and length of the vagina following radiation therapy.

* Healing after gender-affirming surgery

* Pelvic pain

* History of sexual trauma

* History of female genital mutilation (FGM) also known as infibulation, and female circumcision.

* Vaginal narrowing

* Vaginal agenesis (undeveloped vagina)

Generally, dilators are best approached as a part of a treatment plan that may include relaxation techniques, stretching, pelvic mobility, and hands-on treatment with a pelvic floor physiotherapist.

Using vaginal dilators:

* Should help reduce anxiety associated with touch and penetration around the vaginal area as well as pain

* Be part of a graded exposure progress in teaching the pelvic floor muscles to gradually and gently stretch and not spasm painfully with touch or the thought of touch.

* Requires privacy - where you will feel most comfortable

* Should allow you to progress at your own pace, and meet your own goals.

USE A LUBRICANT THAT WORKS FOR YOU!
It's important to use a water-based personal lubricant that does not irritate you. Some people prefer coconut oil or shea butter and don't mind cleaning their dilators with simple soap immediately after use. Silicone-based lubricants should not be used with silicone dilators. I make water-based all natural Personal Lubricant, and I also sell coconut oil and shea butter.

HELP!
You don't need to go it alone! Consider seeing a Pelvic Floor Physiotherapist. A local hospital or health clinic may have specialists. There are likely free support groups and video resources online for your condition.